Friday June 27

RIP Grandpa. He died in his sleep about an hour ago. Thank you for everything you ever did for me. I love you. It is now 4:00am and i can't sleep and i find myself teary. I am trying to cope with the loss of a loved one for the first time in my life. Well, i am coping,not trying to cope. This was not a surprise and we all knew it was going to happen for about 2 months now. But knowing it was going to happen does not mean it is still not sad.
As I tried to sleep earlier tonight, my mind was racing, thinking about all 4 of my grandparents. I was remembering moments with or things about them that made me smile.
These are just some of the ones that went through my head about him:
- Dune buggy. When we were kids he kept a dune buggy in the shed that he would bring out a few times a year and give everyone rides in the park.
- One of my early childhood memories is of him taking me and my brother Joey to the doctor for some sort of shots. We were in his Ford LTD and Joey was still crying about it hurting. Grandpa tried to make us feel better by taking us to Friendlys for some ice cream.
- The cruise he went on with us. I have been on 5 cruises in my life and i can honestly say that my favorite one was the one that he came with us on. Him and I spent alot of time together by the pool and in the casino playing blackjack during that week long trip. We laughed alot and drank more than we both should have.
- Politics. He was a far left wing Democrat. He always watched C-Span and knew about what was going on in our government. I always got a kick out of telling him i was cancelling his vote by voting republican.
- His towel. I lived with him for 10+ years and saw him in his favorite outfit hundreds of times. A towel. I imagine it was extremely comfortable.
- His stash of 70's dirty movies on vhs. Thanks to his collection, there were alot of neighborhood boys who look back fondly at the original Debbie does Dallas and Taboo movies.
- His ability to seem to be able to fix anything. He was very handy with tools and could fix anything on a car, a radio and even a computer. After he retired he took classes on electronics, computers, and many more things. There seemed to be nothing he couldn't rig.
- The barbershop. He would always take me to 30th street plaza to get our hair cut by a guy named Terry. We would sit there and BS with Terry and the other customers for hours sometimes.
- Rodney Dangerfield. He loved Rodney and had all of his standup tapes and movies. He would recite on liners and just laugh at Rodney.
- His swimming pool and the way he could swim with ease. Grandpa was always a bigger man. But i remember him diving and swimming in the pool and the way that it seemed so easy for him to do. I also think about the pool and remember the way he would lay around sunbathing in a speedo and getting SO DARK.
- I will always remember taking Rachel to see him in the hospital. He had been really out of it and wouldn't even open his eyes. When we told him Rachel was there, he perked up and opened his eyes. He put his arms out and we let him hold her. He kept calling her pumpkin and was completely aware of the situation. He tried tickling her and posed for some pictures. After we left the hospital he was in a non-respondent state the rest of the weekend.
- The last real conversation we had, he told me to take care of my girls and that I did not know how lucky i was. Maybe i don't, but I have a real good idea...


These are just some of the things that popped in my head tonight when thinking about him. They all made me smile. Lord please show mercy on him. He was far from perfect and committed many sins. But he was a good man who was loved by alot of people. Goodbye Grandpa. Thank you and I love you.